
Table of Contents
Pulling the Leg and Then Giving a Crutch
(An Analysis of the Proverb and Its Social, Psychological, and Ethical Dimensions)
This Nepali proverb refers to the act of first harming someone or creating obstacles, and then offering a small help to appear as a savior. The essence is exploitation: create dependence by disabling someone, and then claim credit for providing support.
Meaning and Essence
Literal Meaning: To snatch away someone’s leg (cripple them) and then give them a crutch (support).
Figurative Sense: First, cause damage; then present yourself as indispensable by offering partial relief.
Core Message: A form of manipulation where the victim is forced into dependence, while the manipulator gains power, recognition, or gratitude.
Psychological Dimensions
Control and Dependence: The victim must rely on the same person for both the problem and its solution.
Gaslighting: The harm is concealed or minimized, while the small help is magnified into a “great favor.”
Undermining Self-confidence: Victims may start believing “I cannot survive without their help.”
The Savior Complex: The manipulator builds an image of being the rescuer, even though they are the source of harm.
Social and Cultural Contexts
Personal Relations: Friends, relatives, or colleagues create hurdles when someone progresses, then claim to be helpers.
Workplace/Education: Superiors sometimes block access to resources or opportunities, later taking credit for “guidance” or “support.”
Community/NGOs: Problems are highlighted to attract aid projects, but root causes are left untouched, ensuring dependence.
Politics and Economics
Policy-Level: Complex rules or systemic barriers are created; then “waivers” or “relief packages” are marketed as favors.
Economics: Predatory lending—first burden with high-interest loans, then restructure or forgive part of it as benevolence.
Information Control: Spread half-truths to build fear, then present oneself as the “source of correct information.”
In Service Sectors
Health: Unnecessary medical complexity, over-prescription, or repeated follow-ups to create fear—then claim credit for saving the patient.
Education/Training: Restrict access to resources, then sell “fast-track” help or tuition as the only solution.
Linguistic and Moral Angles
Similar Sayings: “Create the problem, then sell the cure.”
Opposite Ideal: True empowerment—help that strengthens independence, not dependence.
Moral Critique: Not all relief is bad; the key is whether the helper caused the harm and whether the help builds long-term freedom or not.
Ethical Principles
Non-violence and Integrity: Do not harm in the first place.
Justice and Accountability: Identify root causes and who is responsible.
Equality and Dignity: Real help preserves autonomy and self-respect.
Red Flags (How to Recognize It?)
Problems appear mysteriously before “help” arrives.
The same person controls both the harm and the solution.
Repeated messages: “Without me, you cannot succeed.”
Short-term fixes, not long-term solutions.
Individual Strategies
Documentation: Keep records of how harm occurred.
Boundary Setting: Learn to say “no” and clarify terms of help.
Diversify Support: Avoid dependence on a single source.
Empowerment: Build financial, legal, and professional literacy.
Critical Reflection: Distinguish genuine help from manipulative favors.
Institutional Strategies
Root Solutions: Simplify systems, ensure transparency, and reduce dependency loops.
Conflict of Interest Disclosure: Identify where policymakers and service providers overlap.
Independent Grievance Channels: Ombudsman, third-party audits, and right-to-information.
Outcome-Oriented Aid: Ensure help translates into measurable independence.
Reward and Penalty: Punish manipulative models, incentivize true empowerment.
Illustrative Examples
Workplace: Resources are withheld, then suddenly “granted” by the boss to claim credit.
Finance: Overloaded with loans, later given a “relief plan” portrayed as kindness.
Community Projects: Same issues highlighted yearly, funds received, but no structural change.
Digital Services: Restrict features, then sell “premium” upgrades as the only way out.
Evaluation Criteria
To distinguish between fake crutches and real empowerment:
Does the help create independence or dependence?
Is the process transparent?
Are costs reduced long-term?
Are skills and ownership transferred to the beneficiary?
Is there accountability for the initial harm?
Prevention
Education and Awareness: Critical thinking, financial and media literacy.
Community Unity: Collective voice is harder to manipulate.
Focus on Sustainability: Long-term capacity building over temporary relief.
Codes of Ethics: Institutions must adopt strict guidelines and disclose conflicts of interest.
Written Agreements: Define terms of assistance clearly.
Message for Leaders
True Leadership empowers, it does not enslave.
Share Credit instead of monopolizing it.
Second-Order Thinking: Relief should not reinforce deeper problems.
Conclusion
The proverb “Pulling the leg and then giving a crutch” is more than a saying—it reflects real patterns in personal life, politics, economics, and institutions. Its essence lies in control, dependence, and image management. The antidote is transparency, accountability, and empowerment: genuine support strengthens autonomy and dignity, while manipulative support traps people in cycles of dependence.
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